5 Ways I've had to Grow Up

Let's see if you measure up to even the minimum of the standards I have set for you

Many find my child-like nature endearing, but child-likeness can only get your so far in life (or so they say).

Here are five ways I've had to grow up.

#5 That is not a breakfast food...that's not even food!

Oh the days when I just opened the fridge, drank from the orange juice carton, grabbed a few pieces of left over Chinese food, and sat in my pajamas watching the History channel. Hold on..I have to clean the drool off my keyboard.....Yeah those were the days. Now, I've quit smoking, stopped drinking pop, introduced more veggies in my diet, and got a gym membership. At least I can keep the History channel, right?

#4 What do you mean I won't be in school forever?

I found out yesterday the government discouraged me from collecting degrees...at least with their money anyways. So, it's the working world for me. Now, I have worked since I was 16 and often more than one job at a time. But...it's the working WORLD. Before now I was some student with a visa traveling between foreign countries. Now, I'm going there to live! I love my job, so that will take some of the edge off. Oh..and I'll be assigning tests and papers not taking them...this is sounding better by the moment...

#3 Why can't I decorate the apartment with maps from Game of Thrones?!

My girlfriend and I live together in a very nice apartment close to the university. We click on many levels, but recently she has told me that having a map of Westeros in the living room isn't appropriate. Dafuk. Why not? It's Westeros. Very mature. I'm going to paint it on two large canvases and label the cities, woods, roads, the Wall. It's going to be freakin' awesome! I can't even get her to comprise to the stairway. Instead, it's the Man Cave, a.k.a. my catson Oliver's room where his food and liter box reside. Westeros deserves better! Fine, I'll paint a geisha. 

#2 No, I want to purchase Sharpies, beer, and movies, not health insurance

Along the line of having a big girl job, I now have big girl purchases like health insurance. That is not what I want to spend my money on. I get the argument for it. What happens if I get sick? Yada Yada Yada. What happens when I need a specifically red sharpie for a project? Hmmm? That beer ain't gonna by itself..it needs my help! It needs me. Who needs a doctor when you got Season 1 of Game of Thrones? Am I right? 

#1 What's this R word? Respon--Responsibility? Sounds like a disease. Good thing I bought Health insurance

Every one around me is responsible. Even the not-so responsible people are tainting their reputations. No one wants to party any more, at least not by my definition of partying (which pretty much starts with shots and ends with apologies). Bottomless pitchers! Strong shots! Chugging contests? No? Read a book and go to bed early? You know that actually sounds grea...wait a second! It's happened to me too. My party pooper side has arisen. I thought I killed it dead. Damn you Jesus.